So much to learn...

I am consistently amazed by the roller coaster ride of raising an infant! Last weekend provided some much needed rest for both Priya and me. With the help of Ashish and his parents we were able to make some good progress in turning things around for Priya. We were able to get her to sleep in a crib rather than needing to be held constantly in order to sleep! That in itself was a huge victory! Ashish & I returned to our apartment on Tuesday excited and relieved that we had seen such progress in our little girl's ability to sleep!

We quickly hit another bump, however, when I noticed that Priya was now having trouble breast feeding! Apparently we had confused her by giving her bottles during certain hours of the night in order to give me an opportunity to get caught up on sleep. We had just claimed one major victory and then we were quickly faced with another problem. I was distraught and worried that Priya's days of breast feeding might be over.

I also began to find myself feeling very confused over the "right" ways to approach various challenges in parenting. I had been reading everything I could get my hands on, but the more I read, the more confused I became! Everyone has a different opinion as to what the "right" way is. It just gets overwhelming to try and sort it all out & to find the way that works best for you and your baby!

In the midst of my frustration and confusion my wonderful mother gently reminded me of the promise in James 1:5 - a verse that I had been claiming consistently since Priya's arrival.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him."

I initially thought, "I know! I've been praying for wisdom all along - but I'm more confused than ever!" But as she shared with me I was reminded of the verses that followed:

"But when he asks, he must BELIEVE and NOT DOUBT, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does."

I had forgotten the most important part - to BELIEVE that God truly would provide when I asked for His wisdom. No wonder I was feeling so confused and overwhelmed! I truly felt like the double-minded man, unstable in all I was trying to do with Priya!

I hung up the phone and, as I went to sooth my crying baby, I began to pray - asking God again for HIS wisdom to raise Priya and seeking His forgiveness for being so double-minded and for NOT believing that He would actually provide.

I am happy to share that my state of mind has been much better since that day (a constant process of renewing my mind and focusing on Truth). God has been so faithful in giving me the strength, peace, patience, and wisdom that I need right now! What a difference it makes when we are able to truly believe in HIM to provide!

I am far from having it all figured out, but am grateful for God's gift of providing just what I need for each day. I continue to see growth and improvement in Priya and thank God for His wisdom and guidance that is helping to make that possible! Priya is back on track with feeding and has also seemed to FINALLY get her days and nights in the right place! She has now had 3 consecutive nights of quality night sleep - in her bed without any need to get up and calm her down throughout the night! Her colicky hours have moved to an earlier time - about 3 or 4pm until 9 or 10pm. This to me is MUCH more manageable than the middle of the night! Thank you God for answering my prayers and for your consistent help along the way!